Poor customer service stands out like the flashing from a lighthouse in the darkness of night: it’s unmistakable. Unlike a lighthouse, that helps you navigate away from disaster, poor customer service skills will guide you straight into disaster.

Failure to master customer service will impede your progress in every area of life.

The Pendulum Perspective mindset is that of a service mindset: exemplifying qualities that improve your personal and professional relationships. Evaluate your performance and look for any behavioral blind spots. Are you leaving a positive impression or are you disappointing? Are you responsive, reliable, and supportive?

View yourself as an autonomous customer service department.

Anyone can easily get caught up in their own day-to-day and forget to focus on others. Take time to be considerate. Aim to deliver delight and happiness using a positive tone and being helpful. Small interactions can mean everything. For example, you’re walking down the hall and your associate passes you, going in the opposite direction and carrying a large box. Instead of just passing by, turn back in their direction and offer your help by holding doorways or getting them onto the elevator. Be consistent; a service mindset isn’t just sometimes, it’s all the time.

Just a few moments out of each day to show kindness and a willingness to help can impact others and will transform your life.

Many years ago, the impact of living life with a service mindset was put on display at my brother’s funeral. Growing up, my brother was nothing short of a terror, he was hyperactive and generally the epicenter of all disasters, but he was also the kindest, happiest, and most generous human I’ve ever known. Alex was naturally funny and personable, but his kindness, empathy and gratitude is what made him a great leader.

People just followed him, no matter where he was or what he was doing!

When he was taken from us in a car accident, the amount of people that showed up to his funeral, called, or wrote, was astounding. People came out of the woodwork, many we didn’t even know, telling stories of how Alex helped them in one way or another. The sheer volume was staggering and made us all re-evaluate how we were living. It was almost impossible to not reflect on yourself, ponder the impact you have on others and wonder if your funeral would be teeming with people that were thankful for just knowing you.

In an article in The Times-Picayune, New Orleans Saints fan Alex Yoncak touched a lot of people, Jeff Duncan said “He accomplished more random acts of kindness in his 37 years than most of us will in twice that time”. In an episode of Outside the Huddle, Janella Newsome reported on the positive impact of The Hammer and Nails Project, which was a volunteer group that Alex started, to rebuild homes and community areas damaged by Hurricane Katrina.

What you do everyday matters!

John C. Maxwell discusses the importance of daily discipline and The Law of Process, in his book The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership Workbook. Developing a service mindset is a process; it isn’t easy and requires “self-discipline and perseverance”, but it will mature you and make you a great leader. Maxwell explains that “what matters most is what you do day by day over the long haul” because you’ll develop instincts, and eventually “your ability to lead becomes almost automatic”.

What message are you sending with your interactions?

The people around you, above and below can feel if your just being transactional. Practice patience by controlling your emotions and express empathy through active listening. For instance, if a customer is angry, don’t respond with anger. Take a moment to gain some emotional distance, put yourself in their shoes to try and understand their perspective; focus on what they need.

Listen to why someone is frustrated and ask them “How can I help?”.

Although you can’t solve all problems all the time, using tact and diplomacy can make you more persuasive and help you build stronger relationships. Tact is the ability to identify and react sensitively to awkward or emotionally charged situations. For example, you approach a coworker to discuss a matter that’s important to you but recognize they are busy and want to show respect for their time. Consider saying, “I know you’re up against a deadline, but may I ask for a few minutes of your time?”.

Diplomacy is how you negotiate situations with the skillful use of language, both verbal and body language. For example, a conversation with a coworker begins to escalate into conflict territory. Take a moment to evaluate what is happening and determine the underlying cause or if your actions or words caused the escalation.

Choose your words carefully, keep your rate of speech and tone controlled; avoid expressing anger.

While remaining calm, suggest a resolution or, if warranted, consider apologizing. An apology is not an excuse and doesn’t require an explanation. It’s best to just state what you’re apologizing for, acknowledge the other person’s point of view, offer a solution, and always follow through.

Learning how to apologize with grace is a pillar of customer service and leadership.

A proper apology helps to reestablish communication and earn trust and respect as someone that takes responsibility for their actions. Ultimately, our behavior and interpersonal communication determines our success. The good news is that we have daily opportunities to improve our people skills. A great way to tackle your problem areas is to focus on stopping negative habits rather than increasing positive actions. In his book What Got You Here Won’t Get You There, Marshall Goldsmith talks about the importance of recognizing the benefit of NOT doing things. For example, making the choice to not have to win at everything you do; realizing you have “more to gain by not winning”. Goldsmith suggests that it’s easier to stop bad habits than it is to start good habits.

Instead of making a “To Do” list, make a “To Stop” list.

The idea behind this is that trying to change too many things at once is overwhelming and can hamper progress. For example, focus on not lying rather than telling the truth, or not being a jerk rather than being nicer. Small incremental changes can have a profound effect, as can recognizing when we successfully change our actions by NOT doing something. “That’s the funny thing about stopping some behavior. It gets no attention, but it can be as crucial as everything else we do combined”.

Celebrate the wins and learn from the mistakes. As solving problems and moving forward becomes second nature, remember to stay diligent, tackle issues right away, and focus on positivity. To help avoid or remove roadblocks along the way, encourage feedback from your family, friends, and coworkers. Remain neutral and thankful for all input and adjust where necessary. Sometimes we think we're doing a great job, both personally and professionally, and it can be eye-opening to discover that others disagree with your assessment.

If people feel that you're not helping them, you're not!